Help Me Get a Facelift!

Story of my life.

To all of you here for a freakshow post about cosmetic surgery, the door is that way. Hallo! My baby is turning three! Of course by 'baby' I'm referring to this little piece of the blogosphere - you can exhale now, dad. I started this blog sitting in my aunt's kitchen in Amman, a mere handful of weeks after completing my postgrad, having already been told by two companies in the capital that I was a) overqualified, and b) without enough experience. Swimming start to my professional career, but it explains the blog name.

I wasn't unemployed for very long, but the name stuck. Although incredibly poorly written in parts and totally useless in others, this blog has seen me through many a change, both good and bad. I've ranted about cultural injustices, whined about triathlons and training sessions and produced odes of worship to the world's of fantasy and pop culture. It's been a struggle, at times, to try and express myself in a politically correct manner and I have experienced periods of complete disinterest and frustration with trying to continue this scribe journey.

However, I feel, and for the first time in a long time, that I'm officially in a place that is a lot more stable than I have been in for many years. This is not to say things are perfect. Far from it, actually. Life is probably more confusing and testing than ever. The big lesson here is: it always will be. Why didn't anyone tell me this before, hmm?

So! It is officially time to shed this skin and bring on a new, shiny and, of course, sassy feel to this - my portal to the internets and all thirteen of you, following me. If you've read through to here, congratulations! You now know that I will be giving away a 'mini Reem' hamper, full of my favourite things, to the person who proposes that new, winning title to my blog. Easy. The hamper will include one of each of my fave things, including a film, a CD (yes, I'm serious), a book, a food item (again, yes, I'm serious) and more - photo to come.

How to communicate your entries to me? You can:

a) Tweet me @itssilverfox

b) Leave a message on here

c) Smoke signal

The deadline for this competition is Friday 18th May, which gives you 10 days to make my blogging facelift happen! To help you along, my colleague was telling me about a sandwich called the 'Unlawful Falafel.' I almost immediately changed the blog title to that. Go crazy.

ENTRY UPDATES:

Kevin: Confessions of Perpetual Delirium
Ben P: Desert Fox, Fox in the Desert
James: Shaddady Issues, D-Reem, A Midsummer Night's Reem, Reem Embers, Reem-edial, Dreaded Mash
Martin: Things to do in Doha when You're Not Quite Dead, Requiem for a Reem, The Good, The Shaddad & The Ugly, Private Fears in Public Places
Steven: Romantic Walks to the Fridge
Adam S: A Woman in Heat
Sanna: All Lies in Wonderland
Ben A: Life of a Modern Lover

Is It The End of the World Yet?

Hello and Happy (belated) New Year! Here’s hoping all three of my faithful readers have had a joyous break and a positive start to the year prophesised to mark the end of humanity as we know it. Anywho, I’m popping in simply to confirm that a) I am still alive and well (mostly) and b) I haven’t allowed myself the luxury of sinking into the abyss of utter melancholy or depression (thank goodness).

I Miss Me

I haven't blogged since July. I didn't think I cared until about 20 minutes ago, when I found myself sitting in my car, in the dark, answering work emails. So what, you say? I'd been there for half an hour and I was parked outside my home.

Who am I?!

What Would Alexander Supertramp Do?

One of the things I love best is listening to people talk about their childhoods. The smallest details thrill me. I can almost taste the crispy bacon sandwiches, hear mums raise their voices over suspicious smoke-infused clothing, visualise the garish neon of a 70s wild child and suffer a broken heart with stories of broken homes. I suppose it isn’t strange really, especially with my love of story telling and the way I tend to immerse myself in music, literature, film and most importantly people’s lives. I've always partially lived in my own dream world. I also have a thing for names. It’s always easier to picture a Frank, Julia or a Steve than simply 'mum', 'cousin' or 'nan'.

So You Think You're Depressed

I’ve done a lot of moaning recently about my current state of emotions, which frankly, is rather dismal. The issues range from work to home related stresses, relationship woes to fitness regime frustrations and so on, and so forth. The past couple of months have been nothing short of a roller-coaster and if I was going to be honest, most of the ride has indulged those horrific, heart-in-mouth dips. 

I realise my blog posts have been rare and somewhat negative/pessimistic of late, but if I was going to be completely honest, it’s only because I can’t bring myself to feign interest in social media trends, or marketing scandals right now. I’m still struggling to make it through everyday.

A New Voice

It’s been a while since I’ve written a post. There are many reasons for my absence, the most prominent being that I once again felt like I had lost my way for a moment. So many changes and events have collided, making the past month or so nothing short of one of the most dramatic in my life. Now I know what you’re thinking, but no, I’m sorry, I didn’t win the lottery, so stop with your cheeky smiles. But seriously, one car accident, a banking catastrophe and a ‘shoved in the deep end’ situation later, and I think I’m back on track. I’ve also managed to land and start a new job amidst all the aforementioned drama, and that’s what I’d really like to talk to you about. 

Originality is... a by-product of Sincerity

Earlier this week I experienced what was probably the roughest day of the year so far. Nothing out of the ordinary had happened - I mean, no ridiculous parking tickets, I didn’t spill coffee all over my jeans and there weren’t any BBM battles over which friend was ignoring whom. No, all of those had happened earlier in the week, but I suppose it was the accumulation of it all that resulted in that remarkably shitty day.

The Rock and The Hard Place

Basically, I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place. On one hand, I could learn to become at least somewhat satisfied with what I’ve been given thus far. This entails a good job with great work experience, living in a country with relatively good weather year-round and paying less than the equivalent of £8 for a week’s supply of petrol (probably the biggest perk living in Qatar, however, if civil infrastructure was remotely more efficient, there may not be the need for a 4 car average/family). This is the rock. 

The NeverEnding Learning Curve

I’ve been going on about my job search for a while now and to be completely honest, there are days when I all I want to do is pack it all in and hurl abuse; at the countless recruiters, in-house human resource management teams and even at the poor automated response systems churning out hundreds of we- regret- to- inform- you’s a day.

Self-Delusion, Self-Loathing and Al Jazeera - Part 2

Al Jazeera has been around a lot longer than the younger media generation care to remember. Founded in 1996 via Emiri decree (a rule/decision handed down from the Head of State), the network has come to terms with more challenges than any other Arab-based news network in history. With legions of avid followers balanced out by equal doses of harsh critique, it is without doubt that Al Jazeera continues to build on its already formidable media empire, going from strength to strength within the industry.

Considering my previous post about the rejection from an exec producer at AJE London, my question is: What does it take to work at Al Jazeera? Clearly, from the producer's response, I do not have the right experience. Let's discuss this shall we? 

I hold a Masters degree in Social Change and Development, where social transformation is key. Social transformation is the shift of a particular cultural mindset within the context of a nation, a peoples, a government, etc, and as influenced by culture, politics, history, the economy and so on. 

As an equipped social impact assessment trainee, I have researched the effects of the Westernisation of Bollywood on the Indian film industry, and in effect it’s one billion plus fans. A reflection on ‘Slumdog Millionaire’ and its counter effects, would make a brilliant episode for AJE's ‘48’, don’t you think? 

I have also delved into the Southeast/South Asian labour movement to the Middle East and the local/regional minorities that suffer at the loss of a potentially promising local workforce. There’s another idea for you Amanda Palmer. 

Barbara Serra is a presenter with AJE in London. She is of Milanese origin and has an educational background in Journalism and International Relations. I can relate, with my background in Media and Cultural Studies. Serra began her career with the BBC as a researcher. 

As a postgraduate student, and then as a staff writer and now a deputy editor, I've been trained and have researched material within the realms of education, culture, entertainment, the F&B industry, politics and many more. Articles I've consequently had published include items covering the World Innovation Summit for Education (WISE), the taboo posed by psychiatric aid, and the worldwide phenomenon that is Indian cuisine. For arguments sake, let’s say I could do that BBC research job.

Years on, she now presents several sociocultural programs on the AJE network, such as one of my personal favourites, ‘Street Food’, alongside news reading from the London offices. Serra is also the first non-native English speaker to have EVER presented the news on British television. 

But who are these people really? Do they care what we feel or what we say? Why do we write our blogs, update our Facebook’s and tweet relentlessly issues they publish? Is anyone listening? They should do. And yes, you'll have to wait until tomorrow to find out why.

Self-Delusion, Self-Loathing and Al Jazeera - Part 1

One of the most difficult things I’ve ever had to do was when I was recently asked to complete a self-appraisal exercise. This was one of several parts of a personal and professional evaluation, aimed at helping to guide me towards the next step in life and more specifically, my career.

Now, although the appraisal was an essentially for-my-eyes-only guideline, at each section I found myself faltering and becoming increasingly exasperated with the task and most surprisingly, with myself.

“Am I really that passionate about writing?” “Do I have a promising career in television?” “Should I really jot down the London Triathlon?” All these questions and many more were playing on my conscience and although I did complete the task, I wasn’t close to satisfied with the end result.

Most of us, even the luckier ones, have at some stage been faced with the ugly truth of how difficult the job hunt has become. Asides from having plunged myself into the deep end of an unbelievably saturated industry, where I often feel like the Tim Burton version of Alice in Wonderland, i.e. utterly in awe with my counterparts, I am also attempting to do so in markets that are still recovering from the bellowing hammer fall of the economic crisis.

Unfortunately, unlike Alice, I do not have a wise, hookah-smoking caterpillar called Absalom to ask for advice. I suppose I could be happy with the opportunity that I’ve got and continue to live my life knowing full well how many people would kill for the career choices I’ve been afforded thus far. However – and although I do love a good fairy tale – I refuse to allow these circumstances to anchor my ambition.

Today I received my daily dose of blogger genius via revolutionary entrepreneur, author, public speaker and THE authority on permission marketing, the inspirational Seth Godin. Having recently been introduced to Godin’s work, the no nonsense, make it or break it attitude that would usually have put me off – refer back to my liking fairy tales – continues to intrigue me with each new blog post delivered to my email inbox. Today’s topic, ‘Self-delusion and self-loathing’, needless to say inspired this piece of self-reckoning.

Now, you can all read the post for yourselves (as you should, as well as subscribing to his everyday feed) but this got me thinking. “Support yourself with the truth” says Godin. Yesterday, I contacted one of the executive producers at the Al Jazeera English offices in London. I told him who I was, what I was looking for, the reason I want to join AJE & the shows I could see myself becoming a part of. I also noted my work experience, the appropriate references and all that jazz.

Said producer came back to me with an incredibly polite, concise and to-the-point answer, “thank you for your interest, but with no experience in television, we can’t hire you in the news department.” Side note: I never stated any desire to work in the news department and had formerly been offered an internship at AJE headquarters in Doha, Qatar. I turned this down because as a fresh BA graduate, I felt I still had more to accomplish before joining the ranks of a network as prestigious as this media giant.

Three years, one postgraduate degree and a handful of intense work experience later, I'm not what they are looking for? Take a second guess. And tomorrow, I'll tell you why.

SKY Is Not The Limit

So here I am, up after a gorgeous nap (have to get my beauty sleep in sometime). I'd had a lovely day thus far. Woke up in good spirits in spite of my late night slumber, with a 'go get em' attitude and a whole lot of job applications bookmarked for hard labour during the day.

Now, although I know the ethics of applying for jobs whilst at your current place of work may be somewhat... hmm... questionable, let's say, I do have to point out that the publication with which I work has quite literally just gone to print, meaning we are on the cusp of a PR drought - which will typically only ease a fun two weeks before the next deadline, but this is besides the point. 

In effect, there's not much I could have been doing, and with my seniors knowing full well my intention of departing our buzzing towers of literary genius, and their blessings (there were also tears, rude words and a fun rendition of Phil Collins's 'You'll be in My Heart') in tow, let's just say I wasn't exactly fighting with my conscience over this one. 

Anyway, back to my rude awakening, courtesy of the Sky Talent Resourcing Team.

A couple of days ago I had confidently applied for a job posting with the renowned network for a position as Fashion & Beauty Journalist. I like Sky. I think they are one of the least nonsense ridden, concise and 'true to their nature' networks on television. Which isn't to say I wouldn't work for them if I thought they were as biased as FOX during the American elections in '08, but this was a bonus. Besides, who isn't biased, really? Also, considering the job I was applying for, there was no fear of me getting tangled up in any heated political debate, much less an ill-fitting mascara wand or Paris Hilton's latest substance abuse disaster or whatever the kids are doing these days so, yeah. Sky. 

No. Not Sky. Not this time anyway. This is what they said,

"We really appreciate the time and effort you put into your application, however after due consideration, we're unable to take your application any further in relation to this position.  Unfortunately due to the high number of applications we receive, we are unable to provide feedback on your application."

Ok, so let me get this right. The criteria for the job included:

* Sourcing and originating content, images and video

* Researching and writing content

* Subbing copy and checking for legal issues

* Publishing content onto the site

* Monitoring site statistics

* Keeping on top of the fashion and beauty news

* Dealing with PRs and agents

* Conducting interviews and attending press conferences

* Covering major fashion and beauty events

You get the gist. Potential candidates should ideally possess the following:

* NCTJ or equivalent qualification and educated to degree level.

* Specialist knowledge of entertainment including fashion, beauty entertainment and celebrities.

* Demonstrable experience as a fashion and beauty journalist with Online experience

* Experience of writing for a web audience

* Excellent and accurate English

* Full understanding of MS Internet Explorer & HTML

* Intense interest and love of fashion, beauty, entertainment and celebrity gossip

* Strong instinct and news judgment for the Sky Showbiz audience

Are you all with me so far? Ok. So here I am. I am a media major from one of the top universities in Australia. I have a postgraduate degree in a field that allows me a better understanding of cultural traditions and expectations via the media. Last time I checked, England was a multicultural nation, no? So, for the sake of this argument, let's make this a score on my side of the tally board.

I have been a writer and an editor for an internationally renowned LUXURY LIFESTYLE  publication (ahem, yea, hello Sky? Really? No light bulbs going off for ya?), which has allowed me the pleasure (and sometimes, the horror) of working with some of the most renowned names in fashion (Marc Jacobs, Dior), international couturiers (Stéphane Rolland) and cosmetic brands alike (Nexus, Clarins, Make Up 4ever). The publication rests in such a comfortable position within its 'counterparts' that we find ourselves spoilt for choice in terms of content, guaranteeing a long list of eager contacts, with which I have built successful working relationships. Oh, and just as an afterthought, I can rattle off the Paris Fashion Week runway line up off the top of my head. Another point on my side of the tally? Don't mind if I do.

I have freelanced and catered for the campaign needs of magnanimous fairs organisers and headed a massive project, that was the first of my duties as deputy editor, putting together a 172 page travel publication for one of the most notoriously picky clients, in under two months. Working under pressure? Tick. Writing for an online audience? Tick. Dealing with PR agents and attending conferences? Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. 

Please let me clarify at this point. I am not bullying Sky's decision. On the contrary. If I felt there had been an injustice (ah, maybe a little one, considering how ridiculously awesome I am) the tone of this post would have been ENTIRELY different. 

My point is this: I am beyond qualified for this position. I understand and wholly appreciate the role extensive experience may play in a decision like this. I, however, am stuck in the purgatory that is the space of time between being considered a 'Graduate/Apprentice' applicant and a 'Young Professional'. What's with all the labels anyway? To be honest, considering the outstanding number of dedicated, creative, little fashionista bloggers, Im not all that surprised. 

What I am, is disappointed.

Frankly, I feel I've been overlooked. I do not count this as an injustice because as the lovely Sky recruitment team noted in their email to me (and as above) they must get outstanding numbers of applications avalanching through daily, therefore logically, replying to every other failed applicant is not an option. Which leaves me at a crossroads. 

Applications take time, applications take tremendous effort and as you would all know, rejection is draining. When (if ever) will I be considered good enough for Sky? Will someone tell me when I am right for them? Will I ever get the feedback I need to understand what it is I am lacking? If I seem such a bloody perfect fit for this particular application on paper, I must be missing something if I did not even get an inquisitive phone call? 

I do not question my capabilities or my ambition. I do not question my inevitable success or my determination. I do not question Sky's professionalism and would still love the chance to work amidst their "culture of opportunity" and to be able to do "the best work of my life". 

But where do I go from here? I am open to your suggestions.

Note: This is a wholly personal expression of experience and is in no way meant to dissuade/influence individuals' decisions to work with Sky. My job hunt is ongoing and this is by no means a white flag. And before any of you smart arses say anything, I am working applications faster and harder than a shearer with a hand piece in a scorching New Zealand summer. And I will continue to do so. 

Ps. I will be moving from the blogspot address soon - too many glitches. Will keep you all posted.

Taking the Bull By the Horns

It has been brought to my attention recently that I am a coaster. No, not the kind your mam puts on the coffee table to prevent glass rings.

Coast·er (kōˈstər)
noun

One that coasts, as:
a. One who acts in an aimless manner.
b. A sled or toboggan.

Seeing as I have never been on a sled and dont actually know what a toboggan is, we're good to assume that I mean option (a). One who acts in an aimless manner. I wont go into how much this realisation has upset me because to be honest, I've always known I was a coaster, and yet, I continue to coast. I think the hurt that has now surfaced and spurred me to confess my current state is the fact that it was brought to my attention by someone rather than in a moment of self reckoning.

aim·less (āmˈlĭs)
adjective

Devoid of direction or purpose.

I have GALLONS of potential. I know this. In the last three months alone I've met enough people, seen enough sights, completed enough tasks to last myself a lifetime of material for a blog like this.

I've been hosted by Mercedes-Benz on a trip to the bloody Dead Sea (its not actually bloody, its salty, I'm just cussing), test driving their latest SUV range, hence cruising one of the world's most frequented religious historic sites in royalty's ride of choice, i.e. the G-Wagen, amongst others (the lovely GLK features in the photo below). I drove past where King Herod used to live, in a motorcade of ten Mercedes-Benz, and trekked terrain that literally had me sending prayers up to Jesus, Mary and Joseph in fear of 30+ meter drops into rocky abyss.

I was whisked away by Qatar Airways for an inaugural flight launch to Copenhagen, Denmark. I stayed in a five star hotel that charged more a night than some people make in a month. I ate in restaurants that provided Arne Jacobsen cutlery for my perusal - knives, forks and spoons that cost 20,000 kroners a pop. I also partied with legendary Danish pop star Thomas Helmig and watched aerial artists spiral down lengths of curtain as I sipped on vintage champagne and feasted on black truffles.

I completed the Mazda London Triathlon. I trained on my own for months, and with a personal trainer for 7 weeks. I wanted to give up every single session and my back hurt, I got blisters, I cried whilst on a treadmill and fell off a stupid alien looking bike (it was a fantastic bike, but Im a noob) and hurt myself. I swam in the bloody Thames. THE THAMES. Like, the river, you know? I raised 500 pounds for a brilliant charity, YouthNet UK, and intend on doing so again next year. All in compression shorts.

In under a year I've worked a job that's seen me promoted to Deputy Editor of an international luxury lifestyle magazine, met influential figures like the Director General of UNESCO, Irina Bokova and Biz Stone, co-founder of Twitter to celebrity chefs, one of the original three tenors and developing relationships with global haute couturier's and jewelers alike.

I am also a masters graduate. With distinction, believe it or not. I have a degree in Social Change and Development, which ideally means I should be working a position that allows me to evaluate and analyse governmental initiatives in SouthEast Asia, i.e. the damming of the Narmada River in India. My thesis was actually based on the evaluation of the labour movement within the construction industry in Saudi. Like drawing blood from a stone, that research, I tell you.

What is my point?

I should not be described as aimless. I am not a coaster. I am much more.

I have enough interests to write a dozen books.

I LOVE to cook. I can identify spices as I eat and have a natural flair for the kitchen. I could name 30 odd chefs off the top of my head, their respective genre's, the shows they've hosted, my favourite dishes and which one's I've actually attempted and conquered. Or destroyed. I could spend hours in a supermarket and would rather go grocery shopping than for a beer at the pub (we can always do that later).

I am a music/movie/reading aficionado. I'll listen to/watch/read anything and have unhealthy love affairs with items I love. I could quote scenes from Lord of the Rings word for word and if you dont think that's impressive, I could do the same with Pan's Labyrinth. In Spanish. No, I dont understand Spanish. I could do the same with Vicky, Cristina Barcelona. I also have more song lyrics in my head than your average karaoke machine in its archives.

I need to put things into perspective and utilise all these wonderful things I've been given. It's one thing to experience and enjoy all of the above, and it's another to bring to life the lessons I've learned and the skills I've been fortunate enough to absorb.

I've just come up with a new commandment of my own: THOU SHALT NOT COAST.

Building A Cupboard

I find myself feeling more and more like him each day. Words like conformity, expectations, norms, ignorance and indifference all crossed my mind as I watched that - and believe you me, not many YouTube videos can hold my attention for an entire 8 minutes (concentration span of a fruit fly). The thing is, like he understands - in his case - his parents' fear of difference, change and breaking free of the Life Manual, I can appreciate those of others.

I am, however, very much in that frame of mind where he walked into the shed and destroyed his 'perfect manual cupboard'. I am still angry, frustrated, confused and sadly, lost.

I was never much good at following instructions anyway. I will build MY OWN cupboard.

Number 8, 1949

I used to think that life was an intricate series of levers and pulleys, buttons, wires, Mexican standoffs and hostage negotiations. As I get older I realize that life is more Netherlands minimalist than Jackson Pollock. The problems don’t get less, and in fact they grow greater in number, but the way I index them in the database is different. More problems get filed under fewer category headers.

Things are getting simpler, and it’s making life better. Here’s the cheat sheet. 

People want to be liked. We all crave attention and affection and we all reject shame and embarrassment. We don’t want to be in a relationship to hear the words “I love you,” we want to be in a relationship to say the words “I love you.” We want to feel needed, and exceptional. We want to ace a hearing test. We are binary creatures; if we’re the plaintiff, we want to win every dollar. If we’re the defendant, we want guard every penny. We want to make more money than last year. We don’t want to get cancer and we want the same for our loved ones. We will mourn the death of strangers while secretly appreciating it wasn’t someone we knew. We go out on weekends to have sex while avoiding getting punched in the face. We drink so we can be ourselves and not mind it. We’re desperate to be understood. We want to know someone else has felt it first. We want to make the person we heard wasn’t all that into us change their minds about us and admit they had us wrong. We want sunny skies but with a chance of killer tornadoes, just to keep music sounding good. We take hours upon hours to admit to self consciousness. We don’t know exactly how to pleasure each other. We just want love. In any and every form.

Via johnmayer.com - I dont actually know who this person is, Im pretty damn sure it isn't the John Mayer that's waiting on the world to change.